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Brigham Young University
  1. The most non-conformist girl in our dormitory
  2. Confidences, confessions, and advice
  3. An intimate little gathering
  4. Girl talk and a run-in with Standards
  5. I just don't belong here
Exmormon
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  2. Youth Conference
  3. Saturday's Warrior
  4. Brigham Young University
  5. Polygamist
  6. Temple Wedding
  7. Orem High
  8. Bordeaux Mission
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Brigham Young University

"Ummm, because the scriptures are full of redundancy and repetition?" I offered.

Now he laughed, "And bad grammar and unparsable sentences. But, no, that wasn't my point. My point is that wine is listed alongside strong drinks because wine doesn't fall into the category of strong drinks. It's separate. By strong drinks here, Joseph Smith is clearly referring to hard liquor."

"Okay, I can guess where this is going," I said. "Your point is that the Word of Wisdom forbids -- oops, I mean recommends against -- wine and hard liquor, but says nothing about beer."

"Aha, but it doesn't quite say nothing about beer," he said. "Look at verse 17, where it's talking about good uses of various grains. Here it says 'and barley for all useful animals and for mild drinks.' Now, what drink is made from barley and might be considered a 'mild drink' by contrast to hard liquor, which is a 'strong drink'?"

"Postum!" shouted Paige, laughing. "He's shown us this a million times. He has this watertight proof that beer is recommended by the Word of Wisdom, so it's funny to remind him that that old Mormon coffee substitute is also made from barley."

Rex looked a little annoyed. "Yeah, but even if Postum existed back then -- which it probably didn't -- it's a hot drink, and therefore against the Word of Wisdom."

"But here 'hot drinks' refers to coffee and tea," I protested.

"Not according to the Doctrine & Covenants," said Rex.

Ben grabbed the book from Rex and said, "Okay, enough scripture study, we're here for a little fun." With that he set the book back up on the mantle and turned to me.

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EXMORMON

"You see Lynn, ol' Joe Smith wants you to enjoy a beer with your friends -- hell, if he were here he'd be happy to pour you one himself."

"I care about 'choosing the right' too," said Paige getting into a minor sofa pillow-fight with Ben, "as much as these guys get on my case for it. But it's right there in black and white that beer's not a sin. Different people interpret things differently, but the highest authority is the scriptures."

This seemed somehow wrong. This appeared to be the sort of peer pressure that I was supposed to be on the lookout for. Yet their reasoning seemed pretty sound. Plus it might be fun to take the opportunity.

"Okay, okay," I said chuckling, "I can't think of a counterargument, so I guess I have to take my beer."

"Cool!" said Jake, handing me a can of beer. "You've got to watch out for that Rex, he's a sly one."

"Yeah, beware of later tonight when he shows you the scripture that says it's not a sin to do the nasty," Paige said, laughing.

"Is there a scripture that says that?" asked Amy, surprised.

"Sadly, no," said Rex.

"You've looked for it too, haven't you?" asked Cindy with a knowing smile.

"Of course," replied Rex. "Oh wait, maybe there's one. Will you indulge me?" he asked looking at Ben as he reached for the triple combination again. Ben rolled his eyes in response.

I began to sip my beer cautiously. It had kind of a strange taste, not particularly good. I grabbed a handful of chips to go with it. I glanced up at Rex flipping through the book. Not a bad looking guy really. A little nerdy perhaps. Thin, not too athletic, glasses, dark hair a little longer on top than that of the average BYU guy...

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