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Orem High
  1. And where did he serve his mission?
  2. A warm October day down by the Provo River
  3. Orem's not so bad when you give it a chance
  4. I can rely on myself
  5. Jared gets drunk and gets laid
  6. Forget about her, Jared
  7. A story I never tell anyone
Exmormon
  1. Young Women's
  2. Youth Conference
  3. Saturday's Warrior
  4. Brigham Young University
  5. Polygamist
  6. Temple Wedding
  7. Orem High
  8. Bordeaux Mission
  9. Exmo Conference
Orem High

"Senior priesthood leaders?" she asked, looking shocked and disgusted.

"Yes, and it's every bit as repugnant as it sounds. Grown men with wives and children marrying teenage girls. Obviously I didn't care for it at the time, but looking back on it after more than a year of living in normal society it really hits me how truly fucked-up that is."

"Wow, that's really... Oh my god, I mean..." she seemed kind of flustered like she didn't know what to say. "Um, listen, I just remembered, I really have to be getting back. I've lost track of time and my mother's expecting me."

"But you don't have a watch on," I protested. "You don't know what time it is!"

"No, really, I have to get home," she said. "Listen, I really hope you're okay," she said to Joe, taking his hand and looking him in the eye. Then she turned to me. "It was really nice meeting you, Jared," and she squeezed my hand too and gave me a pleasant smile. Then she was off in the opposite direction than we had come.

As I watched her go, I was amazed that I had never noticed her before. She was so pretty and so very different from the other girls. Her small touch was like electricity to me. I was wondering if maybe Joe liked her too, actually. But they weren't going out or anything, so it wasn't like he had dibs on her just because he had met her first.

"Way to go, you really creeped her out with that last bit," I said to Joe.

"Yeah, I really need to keep in mind how disturbing these stories can be to people who aren't familiar with this sort of thing. Let's head back," he said.

On the way back we really didn't talk at all. It's hard to just go back to having an ordinary conversation after something like that. Once we got back to Sam and Joe's house, I said bye to Joe and got in my car and drove home.

When I got home, Mom asked me if I'd had a nice time with Joe and what we'd done. I told her that we'd hung out by the Provo River. She said it was nice that we'd taken advantage of the nice weather to go get some fresh air.

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EXMORMON

I went to my room and sat down on the bed. I thought about Andrea asking me if I really believed in the church. I thought I did. It seemed to me that I had felt the spirit telling me that it was true just as everyone said I should. Still, maybe she had a point that it was kind of crazy to think that that feeling was Jesus or the Holy Ghost magically talking to me.

All of the smartest people I knew were atheists: Rex and Lynn were, and now it turned out that Joe was too, and Andrea. I didn't know Andrea very well, but she seemed pretty smart. Maybe they knew better than I did. On the other hand, maybe Satan had control over them. But it didn't seem like it. They seemed perfectly nice and reasonable. None of them really seemed to be controlled by Satan. I figured they were probably right about this whole God thing.

It was funny because I had just the other day been telling myself that I didn't just blindly follow other people. But here it was getting to be an awful lot of really trustworthy people. And anyway, I was mostly just following along what my parents taught me by believing it in the first place.

It was kind of a relief, actually, to think that I didn't have to worry anymore about whether or not I was sinning or whether or not I was doing the right things to get to the Celestial Kingdom one day.

I would hate to end up like Sam, all ashamed to think about sex at all. I was already one step ahead of the Mormons on that subject. A while back Rex had had a talk with me about it. He told me that no matter what they told us in devotionals and other youth events I shouldn't let them make me think I was different or perverted for thinking about sex and and that sort of thing. He told me that everyone does it and that it was impossible not to. He said that if I let them convince me that there was something wrong with me for it that that wouldn't make me do it any less, it would just make me all messed-up in the head about it. So he advised me to just ignore what they say in church on the subject and not worry about it. That seemed like pretty good advice to me. I'd even gotten some condoms and had practiced putting them on just in case, on his advice.

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